My Family is Christian, but a Jewish Preschool Changed My Son’s Life
How the Jewish value of inclusion worked its magic
This essay is part of a new collection of work inspired by the anthology On Being Jewish Now: Reflections of Authors and Advocates. Want to contribute? Instructions here. Subscribe here.
When my two-year-old son began struggling with his speech, I tried to tell myself he would grow out of it. How would speech therapy fit into our busy lives? But my motherly instincts pushed me to dig deeper. My son was not only tripping over his words; he was terrified of social interactions. He would cling to a parent’s leg at birthday parties and play by himself in the sandbox at preschool. My husband and I couldn’t tell if his stutter was causing the social anxiety or vice versa, but we decided it had to be addressed.
The top developmental pediatricians in Houston had months-long waitlists. But when a cancellation opened an immediate spot for us, it felt like a G-d wink. After hours of testing and a tome of paperwork, the doctor said my son needed a heavy dose of speech therapy—at least four sessions a week. My heart sank. I felt like I would have to quit my job to make that work. Then he said that we should look at the Bertha Alyce preschool at the Jewish Community Center. They had a special program that offered speech and occupational therapy daily within the context of the school day. The program had recently received an award from the Department of Education for their innovative approach to early childhood intervention. My heart lifted in hope. This was exactly the type of support we needed.
I didn’t know much about the JCC campus or that it even housed a preschool. My husband and I had no idea what to expect when we met Bonnie, the head of the preschool, for a tour. I was simmering with nerves, hopeful this program could support my sweet son, but anxious it wouldn’t be the right fit. Bonnie saw and felt that. She was warm and empathetic during the tour, listening to us talk (and maybe cry) about his verbal and social struggles. By the end of our visit, I knew this was the place he needed to be. And she did, too. I was concerned about one thing. My family wasn’t Jewish.
As Bonnie walked us to the foyer of the preschool, I blinked back tears and asked if our differing faiths would be an issue when reviewing our application. Bonnie took my hand in hers.
“One of the Jewish values is inclusion,” she said. She believed in providing a sense of belonging for all people, and she knew that the preschool was the place where we belonged.
Bonnie’s act of faith and commitment to Jewish values forever changed the course of my family’s life. We spent four transformative years at the Bertha Alyce preschool, with my younger son also attending. We celebrated school-wide Shabbat on Fridays, joined the challah club, helped construct sukkahs during Sukkot, made lifelong friends, wrangled with fear when a bomb threat was called on the campus, and celebrated our special school at JCC fundraisers. All the while, my son received immersive speech therapy and critical social support.
It pulls at my heart that he barely remembers his preschool experience. But what a gift that he has no recollection of his speech impediment! When he began kindergarten, he was no longer stuttering, and he was happily playing with peers. One day, after a Little League practice, we were talking about a teammate who had been scared to interact with the other players.
“It’s different for me because I make friends so easily,” my son said. I texted this to one of his preschool teachers.
“We did our job!” she replied.
When I think about the division and strife tearing our nation apart, I often hear Bonnie’s voice, reminding me about the importance of inclusion. Isn’t that the value that should bind us all? Respectful voices all prevailing to be included and heard in our national conversation. It’s certainly the Jewish value that has uplifted my family and continues to guide me to this day.
Brooke Bentley is a former television anchor and award-winning sports reporter. After graduating Phi Beta Kappa from Davidson College, she received a master’s in journalism from the University of Southern California. Brooke then spent two years working for the Houston Texans as a media personality and over a decade working in sports journalism. She and her husband live in Houston and are raising two young boys.
Instagram: @brookiebentley
This essay is part of a new collection of work inspired by the anthology On Being Jewish Now: Reflections of Authors and Advocates. Want to contribute? Instructions here. Subscribe here.